What happens when they really are out to get you?

I’m a big proponent of following your instinct. Reason and logic is a wonderful thing, but we’re outlived as a species by a billion others who have no concept of living like a Vulcan (and most of us laugh at the idea of living that far on the edge). The lizard underbrain survives inside our gray matter for a reason.

And yet, I find myself lately ignoring my gut. More of my usual second-guessing myself, I suppose. I’m telling myself that the things that I fear are paranoia, insane whisperings from the voices in my head, or perhaps just memories of another similar but different time rising to the surface.

There’s such a fine line between paranoia and gullibility, isn’t there? On one hand, they’re always out to get you, and people point and laugh. On the other, you’re a blind man; how did you not see this coming? And they point and laugh.

I’m not so concerned about the people pointing and laughing part, as I am the voices in my head finding more ammunition for their volleyball games.

What is it Ben has on his page? “There’s always a siren singing you to every shipwreck.” Something like that. And your gut, underneath, knows it’s a trap, but damn, that’s a beautiful voice that makes you feel so good inside…

God bless Neely, who takes the smallest moments to make me smile.

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